Sunday, July 09, 2006

For me with love and squalor

"It’s always about you", he said sulkily.

I usually shrug off his comments. Else they would mean too much. But this one refused to be. Shrugged off, I mean.

Is it now? Always about me?

Remember the time I stopped reading books at night because I was too tired? It was the exhaustion of entertaining you.

Remember the time I stopped cooking? It was of the taste that never was your mother's.

Remember the time I stopped talking long hours with my friends over the phone? It was of the time that never was there after you.

Remember the time I stopped writing? It was to squash your fear of being replaced.

Remember the times I refused to be hurt when you flirted with other women? It was to escape from hating you.

Yes. It’s always about me. It is the only way to stay on.


Blogger thelearner said...


11:52 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

And there's no harm in acknowledging it. Someone would be really stupid thinking otherwise.

1:34 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

Ajay: :)

Lazy Strokes: There is a lot of stupidity then.

4:49 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It it worth to stay on?
Not unless his "Remember the times" evens out with her's!

4:15 PM  
Blogger sp said...

Your writing is always drooling with emotions and diving into the indeterminable depths of passion. I love the peep into human psychology that it offers.

And cool pic !

7:04 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

Aparna: Leaving is more difficult.

Prasanna: Someone once told me- its like voyerism into somebody's mind! :)

9:45 PM  
Blogger sp said...

@Poornima : Rightly said ! If it werent an imaginary character, she would surely feel violated and completely naked! Or is it completely imaginary...

Sigh...this voyeurism sure panders to the vilest of human desires - to peep into the fellow human being's mind. How accursed are we voyeurs !

10:15 PM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

Prasanna: Imaginary- is beyond what you feel it is difficult to be honest. Reality is as much as you can live with.

10:59 PM  
Blogger Shinu Mathew said...

That it is everything for you, fantastic..

12:30 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

mind's hitting a blank these days!!
lost yer number...plz call/txt pananga!:o)
P.S> Have a story to tell ya?!

3:03 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

Shinu: Thank you! :)

Sharat: I see most of what I write these days, seems to go over your head!!!

5:33 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There is a legit reason I tell u...not the usual excuse of a hectic work schedule....but a REASON!!! ;D pananga plz (when u find time!) ;D

6:17 AM  
Blogger Pritika Gupta said...

hmm.. sometimes relations become too demanding.. i ve also often confronted similar situations.. then i ve to go back and remind him of all the things..which i always wanted to forget..

3:47 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

Sharat: Will meet you tomorrow! :)

Pritika: I know what you mean...Its always a race to keep up with expectations in a relationship. The faster you run, you stay in the same place.

7:54 AM  
Blogger Sudarshan. A. G. said...

Either keeps an account... its dead then and there... Ideally speaking, of course :)

11:20 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

Sudarshan: That went over my head!

10:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


hasn't it always been he, him or the other people -

"the tiny mole, kissed...." .." Maybe...." - summer kind of love.

"all the people..." - Voye..Confession of the eye.

"He obliges becuse he wants it ..." - Many persons of love

"he was stupid..He died.." An apology to remember.

but where,,,, are you amidst all these scenes? pretending, scheming, hoisting yourself, or putting up a facade. well that i guess isn't straight, or else trying to rake up an emotional chord. Does it sound bizarre!!!! check out.

1:11 AM  
Blogger Mrs. Dalloway said...

OAC: One thing you can't meet- expectations. His, yours or others'.

2:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nice post !!!!!!!

6:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

best regards, nice info
» » »

6:37 AM  

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