Tuesday, March 14, 2006

The blue taste of rain

I never carry an umbrella. I know you don’t too.

I should have known better. We talked like there was no tomorrow. There really was no tomorrow.

When I walked out of the uniformly frozen room and found the air outside swollen pregnant with the rain, I ran down the stairs.

You never accepted my silent love. You demanded words. Jealously. Tantrums. But I never could act.

It was an unexpected summer rain.

When you told me ever so casually that you’d found a friend, I’d pretended the same nonchalant casualness.

The earth devoured the plump, wet drops with unbecoming eagerness.

Of course I was nice to her. You should have understood I didn’t like her.

The dust settled down with a sigh. Defeat. Acceptance. Maybe even approbation.

I saw you kiss her. I never told you I did.
That’s when I stopped loving you and began pretending to. I scorn your foolishness.

The imperfectly perfect drops touched my tired body.

You stand waiting for me without an umbrella. I despise you for pretending to love the rain because I do.

I dismiss the myth of tear shaped raindrops.

I also dismiss the myth of true love.


Blogger REVerenD said...

phew! that must hav been hard....perk up buddy

2:51 AM  
Anonymous Durga said...

i have been a regular reader of urs for quite some time now..but never commented..but i just fell in luv with this piece...and gr8 pics too.now that i am anyways commenting,loved ur post abt"mom and the blue sari":)

4:17 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Reverend: Battles to be won.

Durga: :) The blue saree was a long while ago! Thank you.

7:02 AM  
Blogger aks said...

hey love.... true love is a myth ???...ur confusing me sweetheart...

7:07 AM  
Anonymous one from the crowd said...

true love? that is pregnant with schizophrenic true emotions! vague, nonsense, myth... where are the standards? again ours! give love,not true love,some space. it just grows. lets not keep a height and weight scale around it and draw out the significant differences...well poornima after the lady called shimmy who lead you to break your vase, the rain drops were supposed to have doused the rage...it silently rages.. rain drops or not..

8:44 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Aks: It feels so as you get older!

OAC: It always seethes. Simmering a fire that never is doused. An occasional post to break the monotony of it all.

11:41 AM  
Anonymous thelearner said...

very difficult to put in words, this vague feeling of love but not "love". well written.

3:38 PM  
Blogger Lost in trance... said...

'I also dismiss the myth of true love.'

aha! easy way out huh? not so easy gal :)

nobody will define true luv for u. its ur own definition. and hence not a myth. wat say?

4:10 PM  
Anonymous Vishnu said...

Great photos!

6:47 PM  
Blogger Xoff said...

The earth devoured the plump, wet drops with unbecoming eagerness.

Loved that bit, so vividly describes summer rain.

10:10 PM  
Blogger Zealous Zygote said...

Good title.Fits amazingly well with the beautiful post.I never thought rain could have that taste.Now, I know, even it could. Depression, sadness, melancholy. Would you ever come out of it? :)

Tell me something.I could not get what the third picture meant and how it was relevant to the post.You search a lot before coming up with these pictures for the post.What did that picture mean?

10:55 PM  
Blogger Dhanya said...

:) :( dunno whats running in my mind...
love u for this *hugsss*

10:58 PM  
Blogger Subs said...

Nice...very nice. Zealous got me here.
Not sure abt true love , but first love is a myth.

2:10 AM  
Blogger phatichar said...

Beautiful... :) But what pics?? I didn't see any.. *wonders*

2:19 AM  
Blogger ashish said...

Read this post a coupleof times, but really confused what to say :(

6:34 AM  
Blogger A.G.Sudarshan said...

If only...

**Gaping at the photos and wondering about their source**

12:57 PM  
Blogger പാപ്പാന്‍‌/mahout said...

[Phatichar, you have to be pure of the heart to see the pics ;)]

Good post. The image of "air outside swollen pregnant with the rain" followed immediately by that of an earth devouring the plump, wet drops sort of shook me. Probably you intended it that way.

The best thing I used to like about the summer rain was its fragrant smell...

8:09 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

10:33 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

The learner: Many a shade of love.

Lost in trance: My definitions are becoming more slack everyday.

Vishnu: I ddin't take any of them!

Xoff: I have to come up with novel ways of saying 'Thank you'!

10:35 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Zy: I don't think so. I always liked your questions. The last picture is that of a flower called 'Bleeding heart'.

Dhanya: *Hug*

Subs: And after the myth of fisrt love is dismissed, true love also gets brushed asdie.

Sri: Ok- I got the compliment! :D

10:40 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Ashish: That confusing?

Sudarshan: Google!!!

Mahout: I didn't find one that I would have liked, but had to make do with this one. Am glad the intention got across!

10:43 PM  
Blogger phatichar said...


11:13 PM  
Blogger SnM said...

The rain tastes salty to me now...

1:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

'...plump, wet drops...' reminded me of :



2:36 AM  
Blogger Lazy strokes said...

I missed reading your posts. Just realized.

True love is a myth, sure. Coz just when you think you've found it, it ceases to exit. And that's the pleasure and pain of it, at the same time, like childbirth. And stillborns dont help, either!

3:47 AM  
Blogger Dhanush said...

Are thes pictures taken by you- If so they are as brilliant as your write ups. Keep it up.

3:47 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Snm: :(

Kraz: Aliens as raindrops?!

Lazy Strokes: Just realized you missed reading me?!!!!

Dhanush: I've not taken any more than 6 pics on my blog! The rest are 'found'!

4:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ceased to believe in that concept...however, I intend to make it feel real for the people (who care)in my life! :o)
and...its not about being cold to be good to people...its about looking at the good points and reliving the good memories!
am blabbering...where's dat blaady smirnoff?!

4:48 AM  
Anonymous Durga said...

yea I guess it was a long time back,but the post "kinda stayed with me" :)

5:04 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Sharat: Drunk!

Durga: :)

6:21 AM  
Blogger Lost in trance... said...

'My definitions are becoming more slack everyday. '

which is fine..:)

as long asyu dont feel bad abt being disillusioned n stuff ;O)

12:57 PM  
Blogger Lazy strokes said...

Just realized when I read your post. Reading blogs was just one among other things that I had to miss all the time for the past few days... felt good to be back.

8:35 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Lost in trance: I don't feel bad. I feel betrayed!!!

Lazy Strokes: I actually kinda missed you!

12:08 AM  
Blogger Sujit said...

awesome peice of work!!.. Everyone like to be with rain.. most of them do love to get drenched!!

9:43 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Sujit: One thing that gets better when shared- love for the rain!

10:08 AM  
Blogger A.G.Sudarshan said...

Google? really?? wow... some amazing phrases u must be searching... and btw.. i can't save the images... it just shows 'photobucket' :((

12:00 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Sudarshan: Right click on the image and 'Save picture as'. As for the phrases, well, :D

1:10 AM  
Blogger Lost in trance... said...

hate tp b pedantic...but aint it more self-betrayal than nething else? coz u set the standards :)

but then if there were no xpectations, we'd all be sages huh?

5:44 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Lost in trance: Uncelebrated expectations! ;)

12:16 AM  

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