Thursday, September 01, 2005

Never say Adieu. Say Au Revoir.

I hate it when people go. Why is it I'm never the one leaving?

I remember after 12th, all my friends were leaving. Standing in the bus terminal, I threw my arms around my then best friend and wept. With her went a lot of things. She was the Miss. Always-right. And she made sure I was never Miss. Always-wrong. If there was anything good in life I did, any good element that rubbed onto me it was because of her. And I knew things would change. They did. Every vacation she came back, all she had to talk was about her college, her friends, her crushes, her parties... 'Our' was soon replaced. And from that so was I.



When I left her and came back to Pondicherry after Engineering, the last look I had of her was an early morn bedraggled look with misery writ large on her face. I was happy in a weird sort of way, ah- she's the one saying goodbye. Goodbyes were never two sided to me. But she had to ruin it. She came a few days later to Pondicherry and redid the scene- I was left standing waving to a long gone bus.



Someone leaving to London and I remember sobbing my heart out. So much so, that his mother who was crying delicate tears, wiped hers in amazement and helped my mom wipe mine. I guess its just coz I hardly cry that all the instances I did are clearly etched and when I do cry, I cry in not buckets but oceans. Piled up grief.



These days I'm those quiet and efficient farewellers.

5 trunks, 1 handbag and 2 children.
Reach and call, else I might forget all about you.
Oh- you'll miss me?
I might. Cant say.

29 Comments:

Blogger The elderly camel said...

Hi Poornima,
You have some really nice posts here, some very moving, and almost all beautifully worded. The pictures connect well too. You have me engrossed.

1:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

London callin...London callin....
miss ya! ;D
cya when I cya....

3:58 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

The elderly camel: Thank you. Let me see how long I can keep you so...

Sharat: Miss me? Liar! Come back soon though coz at least I do!

4:13 AM  
Blogger pallavi said...

well then i'm glad you're not coming to see me off...
i can already see a howling mob though...
hmpf! i hate goodbyes!! :(

6:18 AM  
Blogger tcr_79 said...

Well put -

Good bye's are pretty sentimental - more so for girls...

I am too used to it with all the moving around in my life!

3:47 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Pallavi: Am howling already! You better keep writing to me girl.

Krish: Why do I detect a bit of an insult thrown in- 'sentimental girl' funda?

9:11 PM  
Blogger aks said...

hey love.... i agree with krish...goodbyes are pretty sentimental 4 girls....but then they are supposed to....delicate they are...

7:22 AM  
Blogger aks said...

hey love....jus forgot to add..delicate that they are....thats their beauty....

7:24 AM  
Blogger mannu said...

u make me pause for a moment and look back to my past..to realise the beauity in small things i missed in my childhood.. preciouse moments.. wish i ran to your blogs 20 years back!! i probably cud enjoy the beauty of everymoments .. atleast in a better way,.;)


beautiful post, my lady!! :))

10:51 AM  
Blogger tcr_79 said...

No insult di - you get used to it over time...

I have said some of the toughest good bye's in my life that now I dont think I will ever get fazed about one

You take care...

6:21 PM  
Blogger Azahar Machwe said...

sometimes I think the good byes are easy.. its the hellos which floor us coz we dont know how to react. gr8 stuff....

6:45 AM  
Blogger pallavi said...

awww! how can i not write to you...

10:18 AM  
Blogger A.G.Sudarshan said...

Followed Arvind Iyer's 10/10 rating for your blog... amazing writing seriously...one of the few people who integrate writing with pictures... I too recently experienced farewells... beautiful post about your cousin who used to paint... its quite unfortunate for him though....

10:51 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Aks: Now that is a very diplomatic way to put things mister!

Mannu: 20 years back I wouldnt have known how to write! :p

But yeah- am glad I get to take you down memory lanes.

Krish: No, dont be nice to me. I wont be able to recognize you then!

Azahar Machwe: Ah never say goodbye, say hello?

Pallavi: Jeez- I cant like this girl anymore than I already do!

Sudarshan: Arvind's 10/10 rating! Lol! But seriously, thank you. And my cousin... unfortunate how some things in life turn out.

8:25 PM  
Blogger manuscrypts said...

a 'people to miss' list in the offing??

11:06 PM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Manu: A 'people-already-missing' list which is longer, wanna see?

9:46 PM  
Blogger me said...

this is a brilliant blog over all. i am in love with it. the pictures and ur posts they connect so well! making things as vivid as possible. beautifully worded. :) nice work!

11:23 AM  
Blogger Poornima said...

Nivedhitha: :) Thank you! But how come a comment on this long ago post than something recent?

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